TFW you realize you've been married to a bin raccoon (in both looks and actions) for the last decade

Remember when I thought my life was complicated? During my second singlehood, then again as a new mother of twins? Ha! Hahahahahahahahaha! Those were simpler times, young innocent naive Complication. Once again my life has been turned upside down. N has been experiencing what I can only describe as an extreme and extended midlife crisis. He left the church, then accepted a low-key shady (ahem, federally illegal) job out of state without consulting me, leaving me behind with our four children. Oh, did I mention that we had ANOTHER SET OF TWINS? Well, we did. Yes, I've been doubly blessed. And yes, I am now basically clinically insane. Anyhow, N started exploring his new found freedom by experimenting with all kinds of substances, wildly overspending from our joint account on juvenile purchases like video games and amusement park tickets, and eventually topped it all off by having an affair with a 25 year old. When my ridiculous over-the-top loyalty refused to quit him, even after he thoroughly and completely Beastie Boy'd our marriage, N finally asked for a divorce. Once the wheels were in motion N moved at record speed to dissolve our decade-long relationship. I had never once seen him take on adult tasks with more interest. It was quite odd and most definitely out of character. So perhaps his claims that I don't really know him at all (HA!) hold some water? More likely, he is just motivated by his desire to be free of the very real adult responsibility of parenthood. When working out the details of our divorce, he readily agreed to give me sole physical custody of our children. I am both relieved and depressed by this. What will the children think when they eventually realize that their dad basically abandoned them? It is very disappointing, to say the least.

The great news is that I never quit working, so I have a rewarding and lucrative career that will easily support me and my complicated crew, even when N fails to pay the full child support amount we agreed on. Fun fact: did you know that 75% of fathers obligated to pay child support don't pay in full? Welcome to the majority, you cheating, lying, bin raccoon! I can already tell that co-parenting with you is going to be a true delight [sarcasm]. What can I say? My life just got a lot more complicated.